A week is still not enough time to recover from the pilot’s ending, but we’ve got no choice other than to forge ahead. RIP, Hubbell. You will be missed. This is what happened on this week’s episode of ‘Bunheads.’
Fanny and Michelle arrive home post losing Hubbell and Fanny goes straight to bed while Michelle drowns her sorrows in a bottle of wine. It’s going to be a while before anyone sleeps well in that house.
The next morning, two of the ballet dancers are having a major session of white girl venting about first cars, getting old, and avoiding gym class. Their devastation over losing Hubbell isn’t necessarily for Hubbell, but for Fanny, and it’s evident they know this is going to break their ballet teacher’s house. Meanwhile, Fanny is already planning Hubbell’s memorial – not a funeral and gives a lovely rant about a Buddhist memorial because life comes back and should be celebrated. And then there’s that awkward moment when your dead husband’s ex drops off a casserole and blames you for his death – OUCH.
The dancers break the news to Boo, who if I remember correctly is the one that wore the snazzy Snoopy leotard last week. The girls use this as an opportunity to leave school while Fanny forges ahead with this Buddhist memorial. The banter among her and her friends is amusing, but it’s a little difficult to keep the women straight (and the same goes for the ballet dancers). This is proof that Palladino has been off air for too long. My mind has to readjust to her writing style and learn to keep up with a town full of people with witty lines and quirks. Does anyone else feel like they need a cheat sheet?
Instead of going to visit Fanny, the dancers went to see a Mark Wahlberg movie (yikes! – unless that’s your sort of thing – or he’s not wearing much clothing because that’s always understandable) and then head to practice where meltdowns ensue. As class begins, the students gossip about what happened to Hubbell and then move into gossip about him and Michelle. Clearly, they read too many gossip blogs. Instead of teaching class, Fanny continues to plan her insane memorial and her friends gossip about her state of mind. So. Much. Gossip. And I’m kind of bored and wondering what happened to all the magic and potential I saw last week.
With nothing better to do, Michelle defies dancer stereotypes and eats bagels causing everyone to question her carb intake. Fanny comforts Truly when she cries right in front of Michelle, which is both funny and uncomfortable and may borderline trying too hard. Again, what happened to this show between last week and this week? Where did all the goodness go?! We’re thirty minutes in now, so I’m telling myself these next few segments are going to reignite the adoration I felt last week and if they don’t – well, I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it.
After leaving Fanny with Truly, Michelle goes for a walk, passes a guy in a trailer, and ends up walking his dog. Yes, that really just happened. And as if her life hasn’t nosedived enough, her friend from Vegas calls and she has to tell her everything that happened. Her friend’s response, “You have the worst luck with men,” and I’m cringing because it’s not remotely funny considering what Michelle has gone through. Not even a little bit. Once that awkward and rude reply passes, Michelle begins to have a breakdown on the phone, which is what I’ve been waiting for. She gave up everything for this man and this lost everything twenty-four hours later. I need to see her wrecked and confused and not wandering around with some random old guy’s dog.
Michelle ends up in a bar/restaurant and my inner GG fan starts screaming, “WHERE IS LUKE?” and then I have to remember this is the wrong show. The bartender is named Rico (and OMFG IT’S LOGAN HUNTZBERGER’S DAD!) and she begins to unload because that’s what you do with bartenders and unfortunately for her, he’s already heard of her. This gets her an extra shot of tequila. Rico’s wife comes out from the kitchen and pours her more tequila. This is better than judging her for eating carbs. In fact, I would give anything for a shot of tequila right now… Or four. Then this show would become more bearable. I lose track of what’s happening because I’m thinking about Logan Huntzberger and Rory Gilmore and how I would love for them to stroll in, even though I didn’t like that pairing that much, but OH MY GOD SOMETHING NEEDS TO SAVE THIS SHOW.
The girls are still waiting on Fanny to teach them. At least they’re dedicated. Michelle fills Fanny in on what she’s done for the Buddhist memorial and I’m distracted again – this time by the pictures of clowns on the wall in the living room. This house, you guys. This freaking house. The only thing saving this scene is the banter between Sutton Foster and Kelly Bishop. Their rhythm is perfect and on beat, and they finally get emotional and this is the first scene that has clicked, which is a shame because the show is forty-three minutes in. Fanny is his mother and gets to do what she wanted and Michelle doesn’t matter because she was his wife for a day. Michelle storms out and Sasha goes to get Fanny, who is sobbing in a chair in her living room. It’s emotional and stripped down, but it’s just not enough to save everything that came before this. This causes Sasha to flip out on Michelle, who still has that old man’s dog. She has taken him on the longest walk ever.
In the dance studio, another round of white girl problems begins, and I start giving thought to the idea that Hubbell should come back as a zombie and eat the whole town (thanks @jester1436 for that amazing tweet!) and no longer care about anything except this happening. Except I have to for the sake of this recap, which is now a rant, so let’s get this over with already. Fanny cancels the memorial. Boo comes to visit, she realizes she forgot about the class, and Boo tells her she has to come to the studio because something is filling up (yes, I totally missed what it was). Fanny heads to the studio and finds a candle lit path and pink decorations and a studio filled with people, presumably people who actually knew Hubbell. Michelle says that sometimes you just need to something and this is for her. The dance students begin a beautiful dance and there’s a tingle in my heart and genuine tears in Fanny and Michelle’s eyes, but it’s not enough to shake the last hour of my life. The dancers wonder if Michelle is leaving and before she can really answer, Fanny introduces her to an old friend of Hubbell’s, who needs her to sign a will transfer because Hubbell left everything to her. Fanny is not okay with this. And then finally, it’s over!
Oh. My. God. That was the longest hour in TV so far this summer. The sane TV viewer in me wants to run, but the Gilmore Girls-Palladino lover will be back next week and hope that this is just a fluke and the magic from the pilot returns. Please, TV gods, please.