'Gossip Girl' Recap: "High Infidelity"

Right off the bat, I want to stress that the word “recap” might be a stretch when it comes to “Gossip Girl’s” new episode, “High Infidelity.” After last week’s (final) season premiere held my attention and actually made me care about the show (a little), this week was a bit of a letdown. Truthfully, it took me like three hours just to watch the screener because I kept finding more interesting things to do with my time.

ICYMI: ‘Gossip Girl’ Recap: Gone, Maybe Gone

Anyway, I did watch the episode and I’m going to recap some of the highlights. Again, “highlights” being a bit of a stretch because it was super hard for me to come up with five things that were interesting about this episode. But it’s not my fault. I think I’ve made it pretty clear that I am only watching because 1). I want to see Chuck and Blair end up together. 2). It’s the last season and there are only 10 episodes (8 more to go) and 3). Katie Cassidy is coming back for the finale and I love her (Speaking of, are you guys watching “Arrow?” You should be because it’s the best).

Sorry, I got off track again. For real, here are the Top 5 Highlights from “High Infidelity”:

5. Georgina Sparks: Yes, she is always going to make my “best” lists because she’s hilarious. This week, Dan had basically moved in with her because of the whole disgusting Rufus and Ivy thing that he witnessed last week (Honestly, I’m not even sure Dan Humphrey deserves that kind of torture. Jenny or Vanessa, sure, but it seemed cruel for Dan). Anyway, Georgina was encouraging Dan to shop his book all over town, but several of the big name publishers were hesitant because of the scandal it was going to cause. They wanted names changed, etc. and can anyone blame them? (Would you like to be on Blair’s bad side? Or Chuck’s or Serena’s or Lily’s for that matter? I didn’t think so). Georgina had plenty of great quips, but my favorite was when she was creepily watching Dan sleep (Never change, Georgina). Finally, Dan ended up making his own deal with Nate for The Spectator to publish his book, which just feels like it’s going to come back to bite both of them.

4. Chuck and Blair had a moment: Blair spent most of the episode preparing to debut her fashion line (more on that later) while Chuck tried to prove his dad was the worst ever (not really worth getting into since it is the EXACT same Bass vs. Bass storyline that has been airing for five seasons). Blair was having a bad day and Chuck got a text message from his (sort of) secret love and immediately walked out of his business stuff to rush to her side (aw!). But Blair didn’t send the message. It turns out Bart was manipulating his son again. However, it was worth it for the tiny rooftop scene between Chuck and Blair where they reaffirmed that they’d be together as soon as they got their business lives in order.

3. Nelly Yuki returns to make Blair’s life miserable: Okay, so that’s not exactly why she came back, but that’s pretty much how Blair saw it. Nelly turned out to be the reporter who was covering her new fashion line (She also had the best line: “Tights are not pants!”). Poppy Lifton also made a return this episode and her line was nearly identical to Blair’s. Blair mistakenly assumed that Nelly had sabotaged her and of course Blair and her minions managed to make things worse instead of better. Poor Blair was desperate to pull off the show and prove herself to her mother, but after she had to redesign everything, it was starting to look bleak. Poppy and Nelly won the first round, but never, ever count Blair Waldorf out.

2. Nate’s new girlfriend is in high school: I have to admit I was really disappointed the previews gave this away because I thought it was a cool twist when I watched the screener. We all know Nate has to sleep with every girl who crosses his path so it wasn’t surprising that he was already bedding Sage (the reporter from the last episode, who came to interview him about his job at The Spectator). But then Nate thought Sage was cheating on him so he broke things off. She turned out to be persistent and basically followed him to Serena’s big party, refusing to be ignored. Nate was a little put off, but that led to the big revelation, which goes along with the next highlight…

1. Sage turned out to be Steven’s daughter and she hates Serena: Obviously Nate and Serena had the wrong idea when they saw Sage and Steven sharing what seemed like an intimate moment. Instead, it was a father/daughter moment and Nate learned that the hard way when Steven punched him in the face for dating his SEVENTEEN-year-old daughter. In the process, he sort of made a mess of Serena’s big event as well, but she seemed pretty understanding about the whole thing. Maybe S really is growing up. But then when Serena tried to bond with Sage, the younger girl made it clear that she was not interested in being friends with her dad’s girlfriend, who was barely older than her. After Serena and Steven dropped Sage off at Constance, she stood with her new group of mean girls (how did she make friends so fast?) and declared that she was going to make Serena go away.

So there you have it. This wasn’t the best episode, but it certainly wasn’t the worst since it was actually watchable. Next week, Sage becomes the face of Blair’s new line and that has disaster written all over it. Until then, feel free to leave your comments below. What were your “High Fidelity” highlights?