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‘American Horror Story Coven’ Review: ‘Boy Parts’

Michele K. Short/FX

We made it to week two of American Horror Story: Coven, and Mr. Murphy is bringing the heat. Honestly, this episode flew by for me and that’s how I know I’m hooked on a show.  So far, everyone is bringing their “A” game to the table, and I just want to say right now that Ms. Lange’s “A” game puts everyone else’s to shame, you hear me Hollywood Foreign Press? 

Alright, let’s get to my thoughts about the episode.

Baby Witches

Madison and Zoe need to be put in a corner for a long minute with some kind of “pause” spell before they burn the entire city of New Orleans down trying to play grown up witches.  It’s like watching toddlers run around the kitchen pulling hot pans off the stove while the adults run behind them to rescue them from boiling water. Fiona is not here for having to clean up their messes and she doesn’t even know about their pet boyfriend project yet. 

When she literally takes on the police detectives with her mind (and a little spit in some water) did you notice she never once raised her voice? That low whisper let’s you know she’s HBIC.  It’s like when I got into trouble growing up and my mother didn’t yell, she went scary silent. You just knew to shut up and act right, granted my mother didn’t use some bendy mind tricks on me (that I’m aware of), but it’s the same general idea. 

Madison and Zoe seem to be a little thick headed, so I’m okay with Fiona throwing them up against the wall to get them to pay attention to her words of wisdom. Related, Zoe needs to grow some ovaries and stop screeching like a tween when things go wrong.  Quick note on Queenie, I love her. She’s brash, and quick tempered, and not here for Madison.  All of this makes her amazing to me. 

Delia (and her husband?!)

Color me surprised by learning that Delia is not only married, but also honest about her powers with her husband, Hank.  And where does he live? With the girls in the school? I really thought she was going to be the unmarried, ne’er do well daughter, whose life is only about her school. To me, it’s a great back story to have Delia unable (so far) to carry on the supreme’s bloodline so she’s focused all her attention on her “children” at the school. 

It’s just another area in which she’s failed her mother and adds another layer of complexity to their relationship.  I think we all know I was not ok with the snakes showing up, especially while these people are trying to conceive a baby.  I legitimately fear this fetus is going to slither out of Delia’s uterus this season. 

Fiona vs. Marie Laveau in the salon

Holy master acting class.  I understand that this show is about witches, and voodoo, and other magical things that sort of freak me out, but what makes this show spark are scenes like the one in the hair salon.  It’s two powerhouse actresses going full steam ahead and letting their characters, a Supreme and the most powerful voodoo priestess in history, make each other aware of their existence in this long-standing battle. 

Marie’s hot anger during her description of the origins of power feud between witches and slave priestesses was flawless. What’s even better is Fiona’s scoffing at Marie’s version of history. These two go toe to toe because they’re feeling out each other’s weaknesses to know exactly where to strike in the future. Fiona’s quest for immortal beauty and Marie’s quest for revenge are each other’s Achilles’ heels and it’s setting up an uneasy alliance of the “ends justify the means.”  I will say that Fiona won round one by setting Marie’ s wigs on fire just to flex her muscle and piss Marie off.  There’s plenty more battles to be fought though, and I am here for every single one.

Fiona and Delphine

Lastly, we learn the back story of what Marie did to Delphine as revenge for hurting her lover, and it’s not a potion causing death, it’s a potion giving her everlasting immortality. That’s diabolical genius. No matter what someone does to her family, which happens to be torture and death, or how long she’s locked in that box below the city, she’s aware of everything and can’t do a damn thing about it. This is why you don’t mess with a voodoo priestess.  Ever. 

Kathy Bates plays the beats of grief, rage, humor, and even love, without missing a single step. Look at the final scene between Lange and Bates. They’re discussing intense topics like being hurt by love, being remembered after you’re gone, and finally, receiving peace when you’re dead.  Fiona says, “At least in death you can’t disappoint the ones you love.” Whoa.

She’s very aware of her shortcomings as a mother, as is Delphine. You know they’ve made choices they regret, but they have to live – in Delphine’s case, forever – with the consequences of their actions. On the flip side, Fiona is keeping Delphine in her back pocket to attain immortal beauty from Marie.  This is going be the best frenemy relationship to grace television. 

One last thought, in one of Mr. Murphy’s understated, but powerful exchanges, Fiona says to Delphine, “You run away again, and it’s back in the box for you.” Delphine responds, “Yes, Ma’am.” And just like that, the sadistic slave master becomes the slave.  Karma is alive and well.

Random Musings

-I truly believe my tv is going to explode when Jessica Lange, Kathy Bates, and Angela Bassett finally share a scene together. 

-I loved Nan kicking Delphine out of the house because her thoughts were too loud

-Delphine wins best line of the episode with, “I loved my girls, even the ugly one.”

-The only character that hasn’t quite caught my attention is Misty Day, but I’m hoping now that she is in Zoe’s orbit she’ll grow on me.

Angela Romack
Angela Romack is writes what you’re thinking about when it comes to your favorite TV shows. If you don’t agree, that's fine. She's okay with being right. Follow her on Twitter at @AngelaMRomack.

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