There’s a lot of hair, Snapchatting, and another devastating murder in this week’s episode. Spoilers are ahead in this recap of Scream Queens.
Scream Queens Recap – Episode 208 – Rapunzel, Rapunzel
Air Date: December 6, 2016
Without wasting any time, we are introduced to the C.U.R.E. Institute’s newest patient. Wes Gardner, Grace’s dad, has returned and we might finally be getting a connection to the first season. Wes has an abdominal tumor that needs to be removed and the symptoms started right after Dean Munsch left him. Flashback to the aftermath of the Wallace University murders, Wes and Munsch ran away together. After trying to diminish Wes’ relationship with Grace, Munsch left. Throughout the surgery, Wes is awake at his request, and Cassidy discovers his tumor is a giant hairball. “It looks like Trump’s wig.” Um, this is too gross for me.
When the surgery is completed we learn more about Wes’ condition. No, Wes was not dating someone who didn’t like to shave their “cooter” as Chanel originally thinks. He has a psychological disorder that causes him to pick out his hair and eat it. I really did not need the visual that went along with this diagnosis. Once again, Wes says this started because Munsch left him and he misses Grace who is at Stanford working on her Master’s degree. No one asked how Grace was doing because, well, why would they? Anyways, Wes attended a Tony Robbins seminar three months later which helped him to stop eating hair but had no idea it stuck with him. Seriously dude? You think you can eat that much hair and it won’t build up in your stomach? Wes and Munsch then reminisce about their weird relationship and he asks her out.
After this awkward exchange, Brock is clearly jealous but claims him and Chanel are doing great. Munsch says because he is unavailable, there’s a good chance her and Wes will be “exchanging a hairball or two.” They need to stop talking hairballs, I’m gagging.
I’m so happy that Zayday has returned from wherever she was last week. We see her Snapchatting to her “Zay-niacs” about the “gag for the day” is to cure all the patients in the hospital. Zayday also posts on Twitter and Instagram, with Chamberlain replying immediately to every post. If anyone did that to me, I would be seriously worried they were stalking me. They talk about this later, Zayday telling him that girls don’t like it when guys are too eager because it’s unattractive and desperate. Tell him how you really feel girl! As always, the conversation changes to The Green Meanie. Chamberlain thinks that the costume is so specific that it would have to be custom made for the killer. Zayday suggests luring The Green Meanie to them so they can get a piece of the costume to show local costume shops.
Meanwhile, Chanel and Brock are on another date and he is really trying to talk about his past. The only problem – Chanel won’t stop using the dog filter from Snapchat on Brock. She wanted him to open up more to her and this is what she does. The pair’s age difference is finally getting some attention, with Chanel thinking the iconic show M*A*S*H is mashed potatoes and calling Boy Meets World the best show ever. I love Cory and Topanga as much as the next person, but I wouldn’t categorize them as “greatest love story” of our time.
They decide the best way to solve this predicament is with some *bedroom activities*, which brings us to possibly the most awkward sex scene ever. Chanel keeps looking around the room, yawning, throwing in a moan here and there, and even Snapchatting! Earlier in the season, I thought that Chanel Snapchatting during sex was a throwaway joke, but I have been proven wrong. She thinks that because she’s hot, she doesn’t need to be good in bed. This causes Brock to see Dean Munsch and he accidentally calls Chanel “Cathy”. Oops.
At the hospital, Zayday seems to be preparing for a romantic bath for herself. I thought this was weird, but I should have known that this was all a setup for The Green Meanie. Did anyone catch the Easter eggs in this scene? As she is dropping rose petals in the tub, there’s two rubber ducks – a Red Devil and Green Meanie. Bravo, props department! Anyways, The Green Meanie shows up like they planned and is greeted by Zayday waiting with a taser. She aims at the knife, causing the killer to drop it and then get tackled by Chamberlain but then flips him into another tub. The Green Meanie picks up the knife and unsuccessfully tries to stab Zayday, getting the knife stuck in a storage rack. She then pulls the rack down onto killer but he eventually flips it onto her and gets away, but not without Zayday getting a swatch of the costume.
Next, we see Dean Munsch working out in her office along to a Richard Simmons video –leotard and all. Brock comes in thinking he has made a huge mistake by choosing Chanel, saying that even sex with her is lame. Chanel barges in and tells Munsch that Brock is her man, but Munsch replies that he will only be Chanel’s man until she decides to take him away from her. In Chanel’s attempt to annoy Munsch, she refuses to leave but Munsch doesn’t care. After a moment, Chanel finally leaves. Also, Jamie Lee Curtis was rocking her workout leotard during this entire scene.
Chamberlain has taken what Zayday said to heart and is now consulting the Chanels about this dilemma. Number Five would love if a guy constantly texted her, or at all. Poor thing! Chanel takes his phone and blocks Zayday’s number but also programs his phone to unblock her number at a scheduled time, only to re-block an hour later. Wait, can phones actually do that? I’m a millennial, I think I would have known about that. With that, Chanel has done her good deed for the year.
Zayday makes it the last costume shop within a fifty-mile radius but it’s already closed for the night. Upon showing the fabric to the worker inside, he lets her in. “Midnight green velvet pleather. Very exotic.” The shop owner tells Zayday that he’s made three Green Meanie costumes, but different sizes. He made the first one in 1986, the next a few months ago, and the final one a few weeks ago. Of course, they were all paid with cash and he doesn’t keep any receipts. The first and third costumes were purchased by a nice old lady and the second one was ordered by mail. All signs point to Jane Hollis.
Chanel is explaining her unfortunate sexual experience with Brock to the other Chanels and Number Three suggests putting in some more effort by taking sex classes. Please tell me that’s not a thing. Hester doesn’t think it’s about sex, but the cultural differences between them. She then gives Chanel the idea to plan a themed dinner party for his generation. Chanel calls Hester the “sharpest, most canny Chanel”, for the idea and for planning a bunch of murders and framing them for it. Yeah, can’t forget that.
After the shocking discovery at the costume shop, Zayday is headed to Jane Hollis’ house. She can’t reach Chamberlain because of the whole blocking thing, so she decides to go on by herself. This is not going to end well. Jane initially tries to slam the door on Zayday, but then she shows her the fabric swatch and she lets her in. Jane makes them some tea and tells Zayday all the reasons the police dismissed her following her husband’s death. Turns out, Jane had the first costume made and asked her brother to go back to the hospital on the anniversary and kill everyone. He was kind of a psychopath, according to Jane, so that makes it okay I guess. Her brother died a year later in a fight with a roller derby team but she thinks he probably deserved it. WTF lady. She vowed to never let the hospital open again and raised her son every night to think the same. They would pray together and promise that if the hospital opened again they would kill again. Jane is clearly insane, in fact, she admits to it and then reveals that she drugged Zayday. Never go on an investigative mission by yourself guys! When Zayday wakes up, she is strapped to a bedspring over what looks to be part of the swamp.
Wes and Munsch are having a romantic evening when The Green Meanie crashes the party. The killer flips the bed, traps them underneath it, and tries to stab through it. Wes uses his body spray (“what are you twelve?”) and sprays it at the killer’s face. The Green Meanie escapes through the window and Munsch thinks it was Brock because he doesn’t want her with Wes.
Brock arrives at Chanel’s ‘Greatest Generation’ themed dinner and he’s truly confused. He’s not that old, Chanel. She used the M*A*S*H connection to come up with the theme but that show didn’t even take place in World War II. Later, Brock shows up at Chanel’s apartment to tell her that he was offended that she would think he’s 80 years-old but also that it was a sweet gesture. Brocks wants them to commit to each other for real, including their pet names for each other: Brockie and Chanela. Brock then goes to Munsch’s office and wants a long-term affair with her while he is dating Chanel. What does Munsch get out of this agreement? Double the pounding. Romantic. They then proceed to get it on, on her desk.
Chamberlain is in the hospital’s basement throwing medical waste into the swamp when he sees Wes’s hairball. It has Green Meanie fabric, slime, and a receipt for a chainsaw in it. He goes to see Wes and wants to talk to him. Wes tells him the trauma from the Wallace murders got to Grace – she’s changed because of the Chanels and started experiencing trauma. He reveals that Grace is really locked up in the Stanford mental asylum. He didn’t think it was fair that the Chanels all got jobs at the hospital, so he deliberately ate hair in order to hang around the C.U.R.E. Institute and eventually kill them. Wes then tells Chamberlain that he is just joking and then to stab him in the chest, killing him. At that moment, Chamberlain’s phone unblocks Zayday and her messages are pouring in. Darn you Chanel and your phone blocking!
Everything is ramping up in next week’s episode, where Hester holds a meeting with all the killers to decide who gets to kill the Chanels. Brooke Shields is also set to guest star as Dr. Scarlett Lovin’.
What did you think of “Rapunzel, Rapunzel”?