The Chanels are multiplying by the minute and the baby from 1985 is revealed in an all new Scream Queens. Spoilers ahead in the Scream Queens recap for episode 205, “Chanel Pour Homme-Icide.”
Scream Queens Recap: Chanel Pour Homme-Icide
Air Date: November 15, 2016
We’ve been waiting and waiting to find out the fates of Denise Hemphill and Chanel #5 (shout out to the World Series and the Election) and the day has finally come! In case you need a reminder, these two were attacked by The Green Meanie and basically left for dead. We pick up right where we left off, with Dean Munsch, Chanel Oberlin, Zayday, and Chanel #3 discovering the horrific scene. Even from the other wing of the hospital, Chanel heard Number Five’s screams because she’s drawn to her pain “like a shark to blood in the water.”
Munsch declares Denise dead (R.I.P. Special Agent Hemphill) and, like always, no one is paying any attention to Number Five. Munsch wants to throw Denise’s body into the swamp because she is becoming more worried the hospital will shut down before a cure is found for her disease. I get why Munsch is upset, but you guys really need to stop throwing people in that swamp. They all get distracted by distant screams, leaving Number Five, and they stumble upon a bunch of dead Alexander Hamiltons and vines hanging from the ceiling. This is the last straw for Munsch, who decides to call the authorities, but first asks Zayday to help her with something. It turns out that Denise is still alive (!!!) but basically brain dead. Instead of dumping her in the swamp, Munsch and Zayday to put her in a cryogenic chamber, courtesy of the Radwell family fortune. So long for now, Denise.
Good news and bad news for Chanel—she peed out all the blue, but now looks like a “blonde baboon” because her butt is still blue. Brock claims he still has no idea who tampered with his silver solution, but that it could have been anyone. Chanel believes Dean Munsch was the culprit with the motive to have Brock all to herself. Brock goes on to explain that “the only reason I got busy with Munch was because I thought I lost a chance with you.” Aww. Chanel needs time to mourn but not that much because she has “zero emotional object permanence.”
Because of the multitude of murders at the C.U.R.E. Institute, Munsch thinks the hospital is done for, until the unthinkable happens the following week. All of the free publicity the hospital got actually made the C.U.R.E. Institute thrive, with heaps new patients with incurable ailments coming in. This includes a woman who works for the United Nations, who can’t seem to maintain only one accent. During this scene, the women shifts her accent from British, Norwegian, French, Australian, Russian, and even an offensive Indian accent. Cassidy and Number Three discover that she suffers from Foreign Accent Syndrome and is cured simply with an injection. Brock, Cassidy, and Number Three start picking up different accents and are suffering from Madonna syndrome which they discover is contagious. It’s super fun to watch the actor play with different accents during the episode. In the end, they can be cured by watching movies all weekend that feature American accents, but Cassidy suspiciously bails.
Meanwhile, Nurse Ingrid Hoffel is making Chanel and Number Three’s lives awful (pun intended), forcing them to clean bedpans and catheters. Ingrid really hates the Chanels and I can’t help but think it’s not only because they are not qualified to be working at the hospital, as she claims. Upon leaving, Ingrid gives the pair even grosser tasks—straining fecal samples and retrieving a semen sample from a guy in a coma. Also, is it possible Ingrid could actually be a Chanel? Her demeanor and departing “catch you later, bitches”, is eerily similar.
Chanel decides to “have a will to live” they need more Chanels to boss around. She has the idea to recruit pledges and make turn them into minions, using the logic that you always need to have less attractive people surround you. Chanel also believes The Green Meanie would want to kill the new Chanels before they even touched her or Number Three. Unfortunately, no one really wants to be a Chanel so they start recruiting patients who aren’t too thrilled either. Needing more Chanels, they decide they must call Tristan. Tristan is Chanel obsessed and even wrote lesbian fan-fiction about the Chanels during their murder trial. Chanel introduces the new Chanels—Number Seven, Number Eight, and Tristan/Chanel Pour Homme. Number Five argues that having a Chanel that is “male and gay” is against the rules, but Chanel doesn’t think it matters because now they all have human shields.
Zayday addresses her concerns to Munsch about Chamberlain being “the baby in the belly” from 1985. Here’s where things get suspicious: Munsch didn’t even hire Chamberlain. When asked about this, Chamberlain responds that he just enjoys helping people. Zayday enlists Chanel #5 for help to find the baby’s mother and after finding her address from her husband’s Missing Persons report, they decide to pay her a visit. Apparently, Jane hasn’t seen her son in years and she has never remarried or had more children. When asked about she thinks happened that night in 1985, she’s certain that her husband’s body was dumped in the swamp. Zayday tells Number Five that Chamberlain can’t possibly be Jane’s son because she’s white. Before leaving they spot a photo of Jane and her husband proving that the baby would be bi-racial and could still be Chamberlain.
While working the graveyard shift, Chanel hears creepy moaning and discovers Hester (seriously, where has she been this whole time?) who wants to rejoin the Chanels. Against better judgment, Chanel agrees and declares that Hester will be moving in with the Chanels because she can keep them from getting killed. Hmm, I don’t know about that. The Chanels throw slumber party at the hospital complete with a makeover montage. They decide to bait The Green Meanie with Chanel #8/Moebius girl, telling her there’s a gift for her hidden in the morgue. While looking for her gift, with The Green Meanie looming, Tristan/Chanel Pour Homme appears saying he deserves it more than her. Being the nice person she is, Chanel #8 leaves Tristan to find the gift. The Chanels find Tristan laying on a morgue table with his guts ripped out.
Munsch invites Nurse Hoffel to her office and fires her, saying she doesn’t like the way she treats the hospital staff, mainly the Chanels. Nurse Hoffel blackmails Munsch, saying she will tell anyone who will listen about Munsch’s disease. Before leaving Hoffel threatens Munsch not to cross her ever again.
When Munsch finds out there’s been another murder in the hospital and that Hester is nowhere to be found, she is livid. She commends Chanels for the idea of bringing new Chanels on board and she has hired three more Chanels to help them work even more efficiently. Introducing Chanel #9, #10, and #11. Munsch then threatens the girls that if she finds out they are hiding Hester, she will report them as accessories to murder, and watch them get fried in the electric chair. Chanel #7 through #11 roam the hallways only to be confronted by The Green Meanie. They all manage to get away, except Chanel #11 who has eleven fingers. The killer does her a solid by chopping off her extra finger but then stabs right through her.
We finally discover Cassidy’s secret weekend plans and that he is the baby in the belly from 1985! Jane tells him that people from the hospital came over earlier and that they know about his dad. Cassidy tells her not to worry and that he will “take care of everything.”