Sons of Anarchy Review: Some Strange Eruption

SONS OF ANARCHY -- "Some Strange Eruption" -- Episode 705 -- Airs Tuesday, October 7, 10:00 pm e/p) -- Pictured: Charlie Hunnam as Jackson "Jax" Teller. CR: Prashant Gupta/FX

How do you top at least thirsty dead hookers? ….You don’t. Not with this episode, and can you just imagine the clean up process once the bodies are out of there? Yikes. Lysol and Clorox wipes everywhere! As always let’s take a look at the major moments of last night’s show:

I am ABEL to tell a Psycho when I see one: Abel is one creepy little dude and I personally blame Courtney Love. She’s probably making him listen to Hole. That’s never safe. Jax tells his son (yes he actually took the time to sit and have a conversation with him) that he is in charge of protecting everyone. He left out the part where he tells him he is doing a real shitty job so far. Then he later decides to “protect” his little brother with a hammer. How do you know you are related to Gemma? You start threatening to harm people under the age of ten. Great job everyone, how dare you prove Tara right!

OMG SHUT UP!: Wendy has such a big fucking mouth. I’ve ignored it to this point because she has entertained me, but seriously you are going to wind up Sopranos style dead again if you don’t shut up. She tells Unser she noticed Nero and the Chinese talking. Why do we have to tell the old dying guy everything? Is this like an unwritten rule I am missing? Also, STILL A COP! This is why Jax has trust issues, everyone around him has a big mouth and now he trusts Wendy with his kids and she goes and blabs club business. Don’t trust the ho.

Chibthea: So….I am ready for a break. Like I was all for this, and Chibs got some loving, but this bitch is a stage five clinger and I am officially done. This is way too intense for like Day 3 of the relationship. Also, not going to lie but I am really disappointed in seeing half dressed Chibs. I was expecting more buff and less Guinness filled belly bloat. Anywho, did we need to have a “what was last night?” conversation? No! It’s plain weird and she should really stop wearing her hair in a bun because she looks way better with her hair down. Althea also tries to rationalize why she takes bribes. Look, you take bribes because you are a greedy asshole. Yes you are making connections, but you are still using the money afterwards to buy yourself something nice so shut up with the whole justification nonsense. Last I checked, normal cops don’t help criminals or sleep with suspects. Luckily for the club she’s all up in Chib’s grill and she warns him about the cops heading their way.

Worst Location to Hide: Red Woody. Crying prostitutes, non Union porn stars, amped up drunks, and white trash. Who wouldn’t think twice about blowing up this place?

Juice Takes Out the Chinese Guy: Get it? Take out? Chinese…forget it. Juice thinks one of Lin’s men is following him, so he kills the guy. Completely rational, especially when he freaks that the dead body is staring at him. Unser and Gemma stumble onto the scene and inform Juice he is a complete moron who couldn’t pass first grade. The man was actually the Motel employee coming to collect his cash. Stellar as always Juicy! Gemma decides to get Juice out of town, and it becomes more and more obvious Gemma is about to squeeze the Juice and kill the little bitch. Then by some miracle, Juice actually figures it out. So he was racist and mistakes a random Chinese guy as gang member, but he is able to figure out Gemma is lying? First off, Gemma always lies so no big deal. Instert Fancy But here because Juice is clearly delusional and slightly schizophrenic.  He catches Gemma in a lie about Nero helping him escape, and causes the car to veer off the road. Last we see Gemma she is pleading for her life as Juice holds her at gunpoint. I was actually on Gemma’s side at this point. Juice has a big mouth, of course she was going to kill him. Do I think Juice will kill her? [Spoiler Alert] He’s a big fucking idiot so of course he lets her live.

Who Said Wha? And Who did Wha?: So here is a quick recap of all the action in the simplest of explanations. Ahem. Jax surrounded by dead bodiesà Chinese meet with Nero about killing everyone at Diosaà Lin will kill Nero and his son if he doesn’t deliver Jax to himàNero punches Jaxà Robocop mentions his fucking docks againàNero tells Lin all about SAMCRO’s plan to ambush his menà Nero lied, Jax and Chibs are the only ones thereà“Cops” and SAMCRO trap the Chinese and Lin and Jax engage in a fist fightà Jax’s wins but Lin lives since the real cops are closing inà Lin and his men are arrestedà SAMCRO shoots up remaining Chinese gang membersà All is well in Charming until they get into another freaking fight as per usual.

So who betrayed SAMCRO to Lin about the location of the guns? Was it Robocop or could it have been Jury? How will the Mayans respond to Nero’s involvement with SAMCRO? Will Juice betray the club once again? Who will pick up Gemma in the middle of nowhere? And will all the dirt come out of the leather? It’s not like they can get their laundry done now after they shot up the place! Tune in next week for an all new Sons of Anarchy.

Amanda Drago
Amanda Drago is a writer at TVSource Magazine. Also known as “Hot Mess Mandy”, she's fan of sarcasm and snark with a Bachelor’s Degree in handling the “cray” and a Masters in real talk. Huge fan of soaps, reality TV, and really any well written show that can handle her short attention span. Usually the trashier the show, the better. Follow her on Twitter at @HotMessMandy

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